bla bla black sheep

my dad refuse to sign my result sheet. LOL. what the.
guys tell me, did my exam results suck?
i get 18 per 46 pupils in 4s6. honestly, i think this is not bad ad right? (maybe?)
but my dad said a lots to me tonight. he said, you're more useless-er now.

that means before that i very 'useful'? :)

i think i understand my dad's feeling now. really. don't want say i chuan la, honestly, my results when primary school is better than now hundred times.
so if my parents cant accept this, i can understand them. true.

dad, mum, sorry.

i felt sorry.
when i form 2, i do my best for study, even though i get shita results too. but i think it was better than now one.
i think about this that time: i do well for study, it's just for parents.
i just don't want they feel disappointed. but i don't scare if they want scold me.
so i pia in every exam. but i never concentrated on study when in class.

due to this, because i get too much stress, i get lebih shita results. and i cried down.
since that day, i figure out something.

if i put too much effort on something, once i can't get the same results with my effort, it sucks.

if i nvr do well on it, so if i get shit results, it was okay.

at least it's better than first one.
but now i'm clear.

i work hard for myself. 

but not parents, friends, or lovers.
all are just bla bla black sheep.

damn. all nonsense.